tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1410068166190075767.post7263394205077269434..comments2023-10-20T10:58:10.264-04:00Comments on Write Now, Right Now: First ParagraphBetsy Ashtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06871010122475160477noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1410068166190075767.post-58115183641493856572010-10-22T18:13:36.392-04:002010-10-22T18:13:36.392-04:00My best friend calls herself Patricia, I call her ...My best friend calls herself Patricia, I call her Tricia, and her husband calls her Trish. So I just might be an expert on this one. Ha!<br><br>I'm guessing this is a very character driven story, so what first struck me is that I don't know what Patricia thinks "Patricia" means. Does she think of herself as sophisticated? Mature? Classy? What does she see that others do not?<br><br>Something like: Patricia liked to think her name suited her. Intelligent. Responsible. No-nonsense. So what did it mean that everyone else insisted on calling her "Trish." <br><br>I obviously have no idea what the story is about, and my example might be way off base--take it or leave it:) I do like the idea of this character, though. Either no one really knows her, or she doesn't really know herself. Fun!Rhiannon Ellishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05191642775214341576noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1410068166190075767.post-4801281432397545642010-10-23T15:25:21.494-04:002010-10-23T15:25:21.494-04:00Rhiannon, you are not far off base with your comme...Rhiannon, you are not far off base with your comments about what "Patricia" means to the character. I planned to develop it more strongly on the next page through a scene that shows her position in her family. She's only 12, but she's unhappy not having the identity she was given at birth. She knows who she is and wants to be but feels held back by her family. And at twelve, that's probably the majority of us, not the minority of us. Only one person much later in the story will call her Patricia. <br><br>Thanks for the suggestions. I take every one to heart.Betsy Ashtonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06871010122475160477noreply@blogger.com